Scott McCall (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
semifreakingnormal) wrote2014-05-15 12:03 pm
semifreakingnormal) wrote2014-05-15 12:03 pm
( 014 ) Ω ( VIDEO + SPAM )
[Okay. He learned from the last time. He doesn't have to apologize. That doesn't mean he's not struggling with the memories of what he did.
Scott's eyes aren't quite red rimmed, but he is far from relaxed. It's obvious he's broadcasting from the infirmary: there still some structural damage around as the Admiral slowly fixes things.]
I'm, um.
[Sorry sorry sorry sorry. He swallows it back, draws in a shaky breath.]
I'm in the infirmary. [He looks around over his shoulder.] Obviously. I know there's not a lot the doctors can do for people who are death tolling. But one of the things I learned at home can help. I can take away pain, when I touch people. So, I'll - I'll be here. I'l be around. Just let me know if you're hurting, and I'll make it better for a while.
[He doesn't mention that he takes the pain on himself. He hopes Stiles and Dean won't say anything, either. It feels like penance, though that's not the only reason he's offering. If he can help people and feel like he's scouring away his guilt, well...then he's going to.]
[Private to Peter]
You were right. I'm definitely thanking you after.
Are you okay?
[Spam for Stiles and Lydia]
[He's been at her bedside in the infirmary since they reappeared back on the Barge, waiting for her to wake up. He knows she will. Knows it deep in his gut, because the Admiral hasn't failed them like this. He won't leave her there, and he won't leave her dead.
There's a whisper of doubt in his thought, and he's doing the best he can to banish it. It leaves his throat and mouth dry, and he doesn't know what to do.
Looking over the bed at Stiles, he draws in breath to say something, anything, but he can't. It wasn't him, but he remembers tearing her throat out, he remembers Stiles' face when it happened, and he has to look down at his hands again.]
Scott's eyes aren't quite red rimmed, but he is far from relaxed. It's obvious he's broadcasting from the infirmary: there still some structural damage around as the Admiral slowly fixes things.]
I'm, um.
[Sorry sorry sorry sorry. He swallows it back, draws in a shaky breath.]
I'm in the infirmary. [He looks around over his shoulder.] Obviously. I know there's not a lot the doctors can do for people who are death tolling. But one of the things I learned at home can help. I can take away pain, when I touch people. So, I'll - I'll be here. I'l be around. Just let me know if you're hurting, and I'll make it better for a while.
[He doesn't mention that he takes the pain on himself. He hopes Stiles and Dean won't say anything, either. It feels like penance, though that's not the only reason he's offering. If he can help people and feel like he's scouring away his guilt, well...then he's going to.]
[Private to Peter]
You were right. I'm definitely thanking you after.
Are you okay?
[Spam for Stiles and Lydia]
[He's been at her bedside in the infirmary since they reappeared back on the Barge, waiting for her to wake up. He knows she will. Knows it deep in his gut, because the Admiral hasn't failed them like this. He won't leave her there, and he won't leave her dead.
There's a whisper of doubt in his thought, and he's doing the best he can to banish it. It leaves his throat and mouth dry, and he doesn't know what to do.
Looking over the bed at Stiles, he draws in breath to say something, anything, but he can't. It wasn't him, but he remembers tearing her throat out, he remembers Stiles' face when it happened, and he has to look down at his hands again.]
spam!!
[He shrugs, shaking his head. He's still wondering a little, still incredibly impressed by Jack. But there's more, too, plenty that he read and didn't particularly like.]
I just don't get it. You did some amazing things for those people.
spam!!
[But he knows it's true. He's sacrificed a lot to help them, and he'd found a lot of self worth in being someone people relied on. Maybe he even got a little addicted to it.
Which doesn't stop him from at least pretending it's not a big deal. Honestly, he's not even consciously aware of how deep all that goes, sometimes.]
spam!!
It's probably okay that you liked it, too.
spam!!
[The eyebrows, they are raised a bit. Where are you going with this, Scott.]
spam!!
Being someone people rely on - it's scary, but. But it's kind of awesome, too. Being needed like that.