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[Okay. He learned from the last time. He doesn't have to apologize. That doesn't mean he's not struggling with the memories of what he did.

Scott's eyes aren't quite red rimmed, but he is far from relaxed. It's obvious he's broadcasting from the infirmary: there still some structural damage around as the Admiral slowly fixes things.]

I'm, um.

[Sorry sorry sorry sorry. He swallows it back, draws in a shaky breath.]

I'm in the infirmary. [He looks around over his shoulder.] Obviously. I know there's not a lot the doctors can do for people who are death tolling. But one of the things I learned at home can help. I can take away pain, when I touch people. So, I'll - I'll be here. I'l be around. Just let me know if you're hurting, and I'll make it better for a while.

[He doesn't mention that he takes the pain on himself. He hopes Stiles and Dean won't say anything, either. It feels like penance, though that's not the only reason he's offering. If he can help people and feel like he's scouring away his guilt, well...then he's going to.]

[Private to Peter]

You were right. I'm definitely thanking you after.

Are you okay?

[Spam for Stiles and Lydia]

[He's been at her bedside in the infirmary since they reappeared back on the Barge, waiting for her to wake up. He knows she will. Knows it deep in his gut, because the Admiral hasn't failed them like this. He won't leave her there, and he won't leave her dead.

There's a whisper of doubt in his thought, and he's doing the best he can to banish it. It leaves his throat and mouth dry, and he doesn't know what to do.

Looking over the bed at Stiles, he draws in breath to say something, anything, but he can't. It wasn't him, but he remembers tearing her throat out, he remembers Stiles' face when it happened, and he has to look down at his hands again.]

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[Turns out getting hunted by your girlfriend's father makes you grow up a lot. Then again, most of Scott's life has led him in that direction: he still fucks up sometimes, and he knows he does, but he holds himself responsible for a lot, too.]

Sort of. I mean, it kind of worked out, like...okay, so a while back, the network freaked out. We were hearing from people who weren't on the Barge. Jack was one of them, and then like a month later, he showed up. He didn't remember, but I showed him the conversation. I kinda think that helped.

[And almost getting killed by the alpha that turned you. And almost getting killed by a psychopath controlling a kanima. And almost getting killed by the alpha pack. The darach. The nogitsune. Whatever comes after that.]

Freaked out, like...wait didn't that happen before the Silent Hill debacle, too? [He kinda remembers someone telling him about that.]

I like Jack. He seems pretty okay.

[So basically, every night of their lives since that night in the woods.

Scott shrugs a little helplessly.] I don't know. That was before I got here, and I...I haven't really asked a whole lot about that one.

[Maybe it makes him a coward, maybe he should prepare better, but from what he's gleaned, that was rare. Sort of. Maybe it'd be better to deal with things as they come.]

But Jack's great. He trusts me, anyway, so I figure that's half of it. I just don't know how to go about...redeeming someone.

[Basically. Some have definitely been worse than others, though.]

Yeah, I asked Peter about it once and he kinda -- he really didn't wanna talk about it so I never asked anything else about it from anyone else. [He chews his lip. He's played the game. He's seen the movie. He pretty much hopes the Barge never makes a return trip to the place. It's one thing when you think something is fictional. It's pretty much entirely different when you find out that it's real somewhere.]

Well yeah. I mean you're you. [Stiles isn't, and doesn't sound the least bit surprised by the admission that Jack trusts him. He can't imagine that Scott's not one of the most trusted people on the ship, really. He's just got that kind of earnestness and sincerity that people tend to trust.]

Man, I have no idea. [He rakes a hand through his hair, trying to push away the thought that immediately springs to mind: I don't even know how to redeem myself.]

[Scott is not entirely sure he'll be able to play those games again. They scared the crap out of him when they were just video games but knowing they're actually out there, that they could wind up stuck there - it's a little different from wondering if Saturday morning cartoons are real somewhere.

He waves of Stiles' words, even though it makes him smile again: Stiles knows him better than anyone, and Scott trusts him to balance out his usual assumptions that people have no reason to listen to him.]

Yeah - plus Jack's not that bad. I mean, I think he mostly just made some dumb decisions.

[He glances sidelong at Stiles, nudging him. He's not sure what exactly is going on in his friend's brain, but he can take a guess.]

We should probably get back to Lydia.

[Stiles doesn't want to play them again either. Or watch the movie again. They hadn't scared him back then, but now? He's pretty sure they would.

His best friend is a true alpha for a reason. Strength of character. It means something that a true alpha only occurs once every hundred years maybe. It means what Stiles has always known about Scott: that he is one of a kind, someone worth so much more than Scott himself ever acknowledges.]

Yeah, Jack seems pretty cool. And who hasn't made some dumb decisions?

[God knows he has. He glances at Scott when he nudges him and he shrugs a little.]

Yeah, she probably thinks we ditched her.

[Scott nods, and smiles. He feels like Jack should be easy mode, but at the same time Scott just...doesn't know what to do. He'll have to figure it out soon, though. Or this whole thing is pointless.]

Yeah. She might have fallen back asleep, or something. We should at least get this water back to her.

[And, you know. Not be awkward about....everything.]

[He kinda thinks redemption isn't going to be easy for anyone. If it's easy, would it really be redemption? He doesn't know, but he'll help however he can.]

Not much else to do when you're in a hospital bed. [He shrugs and follows him, trying not to think about how awkward all of this is. He's awkward by nature already.]

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