semifreakingnormal | ( 010 ) Ω ( Video )

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[Once he gets past the urge to just spew apologies, once he feels a little less like tearing his hair out, he gets on the network.]

You know, I don't remember if I ever said anything about it. But there's an animal clinic on board. [He holds up a set of keys, jingles them.] That's what those keys were, a while ago. I've got some experience working in one so, um. If anything happens, I've got stuff for splints and vaccines and worms and stuff. Since it'd be really easy for one to infect a whole bunch, you know?

[He pauses, because he remembers how people said apologies were unnecessary, that flood-selves weren't real, but like before, it just feels necessary, just to get it off his chest.]

And I'm sorry I was so...I'm just sorry.

[Private to Daneca]

You especially.

[Private to Jack]

So that's got to be, like, the worst thing to get paired off of, right? [WORST BEHIND THEM THOUGH right? right?]

[Private to Iris and Bruce, separately]

And thanks. For not letting me do something...really bad.

[Spam for Alana]

[He thinks Alana probably needs more than a straightforward apology, though he's not sure why. Something tells him she doesn't really have friends here, and while it's kind of weird trying to be a friend to someone who could be, like, a school therapist or counselor or something, he also thinks it'd be nice to know that someone's thinking of you.

Or something. He's seriously not over thinking it.

So eventually, Scott makes his way to her door, knocking. He knows there's a dog in there.]

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It wasn't you fault, Scott.

Yeah, but...I still get to remember it. So you must too. I just, umm.

I don't want you to think that I'm like, waving it off or something.

No, of course not. I know you wouldn't. [She shakes her head.] Really, Scott. It's fine.

You don't have anything to apologize for. It's not like you actually think and act like that.

Yeah. Okay, cool. [It's like slowly easing a weight off, but he is at least calmed by her reassurance.]

Were you affected? I couldn't really tell.

I was. Not in a major way, I mean, but.

Well, it was a major way. I just don't think I acted like it was a big deal because it wasn't to me. Then. Not now. Now it's...

[She shakes her head a little. Sometimes she can be good at speaking, other times something like this happens. Mostly because it was a big deal and now she doesn't know how she feels.]

...Now it's major? [He hesitates, glancing away for a second.] Do you wanna talk about it?

It's just...

[How does she even talk about this? Where does she begin?]

I've always talked about how workers deserve equal and fair treatment. It's my mom's whole platform and I really believe in it, too. But I've never... I've never felt okay with being a worker myself, you know? They're always looked at as criminals.

It doesn't matter what you do or how hard you work at anything, you must have worked somebody. You can't possibly have friends or a boyfriend because you probably worked them. That's why I don't tell anybody because I don't... I want them to see me.

[She looks down at her hands and flexes her fingers in her gloves.]

Not what these can do.

[Daneca looks back up.]

During that flood though, I didn't care. For the first time in my life, I was okay with it. And now? I don't know what I'm feeling.

[It's interesting to hear. Interesting and difficult, because Scott doesn't realize how much it resonates until she finishes. And by the time she does, he's not sure what to say. Platitudes die before he can speak them.]

I - yeah. I get it.

[He looks down at his hands too, unintentionally mirroring her. Instead of gloves, he watches his claws grow, and then recede.]

I was - am. Am scared of that, too. Being seen, I mean. But you shouldn't - that's the whole point, isn't it? Equal treatment? You shouldn't always be seen as criminals. Cause you're not. You shouldn't be afraid of it.

[This may be a peptalk for himself, too.]

[She gives him a wry smile, looking down again.]

I guess I shouldn't be surprised you're not calling me a hypocrite.

[She's always scared that someone will. She thought Cassel might. Sam more or less did. She's really glad that Scott isn't.]

[Daneca interlocks her fingers to give her hands something to do before she can start thinking herself into a corner or worse, start blushing. Her cheeks are a little pink as it is.]

I'm not really brave, Scott. Not like you are. I wish I was.

[He chuckles, a small, surprised sound, and gives her a small, surprised smile.]

Me? I'm like, terrified, all the time. [About what he might do. What other people might do, what he'll fail to stop them or himself from doing. Too many factors, too many balls to juggle, too many things to learn.]

I'm not brave. And I don't think you're a hypocrite. At least I just have to keep what I am a secret - it's not like it's illegal to be a werewolf.

Yeah, but that's why you're brave, Scott. You might be scared about things, but you're one of the most honest people I know. Which I realize knowing the Sharpes doesn't necessarily mean that much, but I pretend that I'm someone I'm not all the time. A lot of people do.

But you never have. That's...

That's special.

[It's his turn to turn a little pink, head ducking as if he could hide it.]

I dunno, that's - you're giving me a lot of credit, I'm just pretending to be - to be human. That's not special.

But maybe, maybe neither of us have to pretend.

Maybe we don't.

[She smiles at him shyly.]

[There are a few beats of silence before she decides to not talk herself out of it.]

We should hang out more often. You know, just the two of us. Without alcohol. Or Cassel and Chris.

Yeah. Yeah, definitely. [He's got a kind of goofy smile on his face, and once he realizes it he scratches his head.] I mean, I never thought drinking would get boring. My twenty-first birthday is going to suck.

[She likes his goofy smile even if she won't say as much.]

I think that's natural. The whole being bored with drinking by the time you're twenty-one thing, I mean.

[But then there'd be even more goofy smiles, just think Daneca.]

Yeah, but I think the not being able to get drunk thing probably isn't.

Okay, well, maybe not that part. But it's normal for werewolves right?

I think so. Wait, I don't know - how much would that suck, if I'm the only one?

There's no way you're the only one, Scott.

I'm sure your body just breaks the alcohol up faster. Or maybe your blood cells or the receptors in your brain won't bind with the alcohol molecules anymore so it can't effect you at all even after you drink enough to give a human alcohol poisoning.

There's no telling how your physiology's changed exactly.

[Sorry, nerd coming out. It happens. u_u Don't mind her.]

[He's trying hard to say something slightly more intelligent than 'you're really smart,' but he's struggling.]

I guess I don't really know much about it. Kind of hard to go to the doctor and say hey, I was turned into a freakish wolf monster, how does my brain work now?

Hey, you're not a freakish wolf monster. Not any more than I'm a criminal.

You're still you. You're still human. You just have something a little extra now.

[He presses his lips together, but he's still smiling in that pleased but almost shy way.]

Thanks. [It's what hangs him up the most, and he's still trying to see himself the way future-Lydia talked about him.]

Hey no problem. [It's just a reminder of what he already told her about herself. That's what she's telling herself anyway to keep from looking shy about it herself.] And any time you need a reminder...

You know where to find me.

Yeah. You should come watch a movie sometime, or something. Or play video games. Do you play?

Um, not very well.

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