( 030 ) Ω ( VIDEO )

[semifreakingnormal]

[The video clicks on, and Scott looks better than he has in a month. There's no perpetual droop to his shoulders, no hooded eyes, no cloud of doubt hanging on him. And what's more, he's not in his room, where he kind of ended up barricading himself at the end there. He is, in fact, in the Enclosure, standing on a lacrosse field. And he's smiling. It's small, a little apologetic, but very present.]

So last month....uh, it sucked. A lot. And I just want to say, to everyone I talked to or should have talked to, that I'm sorry. [His smile turns in a way that says he knows it wasn't strictly his fault, and he's not going to beat himself up over it, but he does wish he'd been able to beat it sooner.]

But I think we should all try to get past that, like, as quickly as possible, and I know there are some new people on board, so...Does anyone want to play lacrosse? We've still got a bunch of room on both teams. It's great for things like, working out aggression and...figuring out tactics? [Scott, never become a salesman.]

Plus, it's a ton of fun.

[He has resolved to be better and more available and throw some unrelenting optimism at everyone, look out Barge!!]

[Private to Clementine]

Hey. Um - I just, I want to apologize. For being so totally and completely useless. It's not gonna happen again.

[Because he's going to be better. He'll be stronger. Because he can't let anyone down again, and most importantly, he can't let anything happen to her.]

Wanna get something to eat?

[Private to Dean]

Hey, uh, I dunno if you don't want to hear it, but....thanks. I couldn't...I wasn't thinking straight. But I'm really glad you were there for her.

[Good job being a friend, Dean, now let Scott ooze gratitude.]

[Private to Cassel]

I've been thinking.

[He's been thinking about this on and off for a while, ever since Cassel and Chris got back from dinner at his mom's house. A lot of it is guilt: Mickey warned him, but Scott didn't go with. He let their heads get messed with.

But the part that bothers him most is that it was Cassel's mom. That she could be that twisted up, that she could do that to her own son. He knows how strongly Daneca felt about working, how she struggled with it, and the idea of someone - an adult, someone who should be completely trustworthy - not caring about it even half as much, has not sat well with him.

So he's been thinking about this a lot, because he wants to do something. Because he has to. Because Cassel is his friend, one of his best, and if he can do anything to make sure this won't ever happen again, then he has to do it.

Not to mention the other thing. Scott shrugs his shoulders.] ...About taking a trip back to your home.

[Private to Katniss]

I'm sorry if I freaked you out. I wasn't really thinking straight, when we met. Actually, I've been meaning to say hi for a while, I just....[He shrugs one shoulder apologetically.] Got distracted, I guess. I'm sorry.

[Private to pack + friends]

I'm going to be leaving the Barge for a bit. Just a day, two tops. I'll be back before you know it, but don't freak out if you can't find me for extra lacrosse practice or something.

Comments

[private]

[theresalwayshope]

Are you going home?

[private]

[semifreakingnormal]

No, I'm-- [He lets out a short breath.] There are a couple things I need to take care if in Cassel's world.

[private]

[theresalwayshope]

[...oh. Ohhhhhhh...

She frowns very briefly, but when she realizes what he means, she smiles softly and nods.]

Okay. Well, when you get back, I'll buy you a drink up at the pub, so to speak. I'll get Duke to fix us something. [Her smile grows a little as she wrinkles her nose.]

Not too strong. No Devil Juice or anything--I mean, no vodka. I learned that lesson the hard way.

[private]

[whatthefoxsay]

[She's been so worried about him - about all of them, but if she's being honest with herself, especially Scott.

It's always going to be especially Scott.

So she's glad to see that he seems alert and vibrant and back to his usual self.]

Where are you going? If it's home, can you bring me back some pocky? I'll be your best friend ever for ten whole minutes.

[private]

[semifreakingnormal]

[He grins when he sees her, and it feels natural and comfortable and he finally doesn't feel that guilty strain in the back of his thoughts. Well, almost doesn't feel it. He still cares about Daneca - always will, because he can never just forget the people who are important to him - and he owes her more than a text message break up.

But Kira doesn't need to hear that right now, so he jyst shakes his head.]

I'm going to Daneca's world, but I can try to find some pocky while I'm there.

[private]

[whatthefoxsay]

[She is finally at a point where the size of the blade in her heart is less of a knife and more of a needle. So her smile doesn't waver a bit and her sentiment is sincere (not that it was ever less than sincere, but it doesn't feel so difficult, now).]

Sounds good. Have a great time, okay? I'll keep everyone on the lacrosse teams in fighting shape. We'll just scrimmage until you get back and we can have a proper game.

[private]

[semifreakingnormal]

[He doesn't notice her steadiness because he's not looking for the waver: he finally doesn't feel wavering himself, and it's easy to get lost in his own head. He knows he has things to do, and he's going to do them. Feeling nervous won't change anything, and he is so very tired of doubt. It's time to own up to what he has to do, and do it.

So he's still smiling warmly, even laughs.]

Good! If anyone's gonna knock them into shape...I mean, I can't think of anyone better.

[ Private : Voice ]

[surfaceshine]

I don't.

[He doesn't sound angry. A little tired, maybe, as he always does; just barely not quite sober, as he almost always is. Mostly resigned and firm.

He doesn't want to hear excuses or listen to Scott talk about something that shouldn't be there.]

[ Private : Voice ]

[semifreakingnormal]

[Scott just shrugs lightly, hesitating because he knows he should just let it die there, but...]

How do you do it?

[ Private : Voice ]

[surfaceshine]

[This is absolutely at least an attempt at a trap. Dean just doesn't care.]

Do what?

[private]

[mockinjay]

I wasn't myself, either.

[She's not embarrassed about it, exactly. She's used to things not being under her control at this point. Even if she hates being someone else's puppet.]

Re: [private]

[semifreakingnormal]

[He nods, understanding - then reaches up to pull the shoulder of his shirt down. There's clean, smooth skin, no scar, no mark that she hit him at all.]

And look, it's all healed.

[private]

[mockinjay]

[She eyes it for a moment, then frowns deeply. Even though it's a relief. Now that whole thing just feels like one of her nightmares.]

How?

[private]

[lydiascreams]

[The fact that he's talking about lacrosse seems like a good sign. But him talking about leaving worries her. She's been more paranoid than usual lately, though. Since Stiles--]

Where're you going?

Re: [private]

[semifreakingnormal]

[He doesn't blame her for being worried at all, and he's quick to reassure her.]

Cassel's world. I just...I need to talk to Daneca.

[He smiles, and it's a little lopsided because he will miss her, but--] You were right.

[private]

[lydiascreams]

[That definitely helps. She smiles a little at him.]

I know this isn't an easy decision, but I think it'll help both of you. [She hopes it does, anyway.]

Do you need any help, before you go?

Private

[voluntaryapnea]

Are you going home?

[He looks a little uncertain, maybe even nervous. None of their deals have happened yet, and the idea of going home to a world where Allison is still gone -- it makes his stomach twist.]

Re: Private

[semifreakingnormal]

No.

[His smile is small and a little sad, and even with what little Liam told him about their future...us not one Scott wants without Allison. He feels better than he has in months, but he's not that strong yet.]

No way. I'm going to Cassel's. I need to talk to Daneca.

[He pauses, torn between not worrying Stiles and, well. The fact that it's Stiles.]

And his mom.

Private

[voluntaryapnea]

[His posture relaxes as soon as Scott says he's not going home. It isn't that he doesn't think Scott is strong enough to go back home before they're done here. He just doesn't want him to have to deal with it. Especially not after what happened just a few days ago, after what's been happening for the last month.

He never even noticed something wasn't right with Scott until it was almost over. He's a shit friend.]

Oh.

[He draws in a breath, nodding as he thinks back to their last conversation about Daneca, and Kira, and the inevitable thing that was going to happen. He smiles a little, but it slips when he mentions Cassel's mom.]

Dude, are you sure that's a good idea?

private

[visetvires]

It was no different than how you usually are.

[Take that however you like. :|!!]

Do I have a choice?

private

[semifreakingnormal]

[He is. Not sure how to take that at all, but he is determined not to be hurt or offended. He's pretty sure he doesn't have a right to it. So he smiles a little crookedly, but nods.]

You've always got a choice. But, I'm hungry, so I figured maybe you were too.

private

[patheticvillain]

[He doesn't know what he was expecting. Not this, absolutely not this, not so soon after Wichita vanishing. For a second he thinks about not answering, just giving Scott space to stop losing his mind.]

What the hell are you talking about? [It comes out scared because he is scared, scared witless, and he doesn't want to be this person but he can't help feeling small and pathetic in the face of everything that home means to him now.]

private

[semifreakingnormal]

[He can't smell it from here, but he doesn't need to. He can hear the fear, and that's the last thing he wants.]

Can I come over?

[Private]

[punched_hitler]

We're gonna hold six extra practices while you're gone, just to show you. [Yep, utterly teasing.]

Where are you going? Or is that private?

[Also? No need to apologize over the rest. He understands.]

[Private]

[semifreakingnormal]

Good. You better. [He grins, and at the question ducks his head.]

It's - kinda. There's, um. Some stuff I gotta do in Cassel's world.